CHAPTER 7

2024-12-19

THAT MORNING

I was resting on my right side while the attending doctor entered the visitors room and sat next to me. I was all awakened when hearing, “Her heart stopped beating.”, and followed by, “CPR proceeded for ten minutes, but it didn't revive her…” For no reason my wife was gone, just two days after tea together?

“Little brother (LB)” raced to see mom after receiving my message. He sat next to mom, held her hand in his. He was still, silent, in deep thought and wept.

FATHER AND SON IN COMPANIONSHIP

Limited visitors, with a few family members and very close friends, were present due to the on-going Covid measures. We, father and son, were with mom most of the time. We would be with each other from then on. This was the time he told me, “I have never thought that mom is the one who left first.” Dad understood.

Suddenly I had an idea of keeping a small bunch of hair from mom for memory. It was also a good idea for LB. Since no scissors were found, LB handed his Swiss Army knife to me. I cut hair from an area close to the forehead and wrapped it in napkins. Later we found out that the nurses could help. We cut a larger bunch. I was greatly disappointed after the first bunch disappeared after arriving home. Luckily the second bunch was kept in the bedroom till now.

THREE THINGS TO BE DONE

There were three things to be done. Firstly, it was organ donation. It was not proper since every organ except the cornea, could have been damaged. Yet she'll be happy with the cornea. So we decided for her. Secondly, it was an autopsy which might increase our knowledge on mom's death. Yet we had seen the numerous red dots and bruises on the body. They were signs of blood clottings and internal bleeding arising from uneven distribution of platelets. Since we had no doubts, a straightforward “No” was given to the responsible doctor. The third one was the funeral.

This one involved finance and emotion. Funeral service is a big business, involving multiple costly items linking one after another. The families who were emotionally loaded and unstable, could be easily manipulated to pay excessive fees for services and products. Fortunately, my two younger brothers provided us with useful information.

Combo funeral services included the ritual, burial and casket. Each one included detailed items with price tags. However, they can be dealt with separately. There are public and private cemeteries. The ritual services can vary. The casket is to be affected by the choices for burials. It allows the families great flexibility to handle the matters according to their conditions.

I'll write about our decision in the next article.